April 24, 2025

The Fourth Commandment of Marriage: Spend Exclusive Time Together

Over the last few devotionals, we have been working through the principles behind the Ten Commandments…and how they form the basis for a strong and vibrant marriage. Today we come to the fourth commandment, found in Exodus 20:8–11,

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates. For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.”

Sabbath means an intermission. It means to put down your work and rest. Take a break. And holy means separate to the Lord. “If you want a long-term relationship with Me,” God says, “We have to have time together. I want special time, exclusive time. I want a whole day.”

In the same way, in order to have a healthy, growing marriage, husbands and wives need time together…special time, exclusive time, sometimes extravagant time. And I think we all know that if we do not schedule it, it will not happen.

My wife, Janet, once did a little research. She found that surveys showed the average couple spends 37 minutes or less in face-to-face conversation every week. I bet before you were married you spent a lot more time together in a week, didn’t you?

If your marriage is to thrive, you need to spend exclusive time together. You can’t build a relationship and not spend time together. It is just not possible.

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